You’ve been sleep trained for some time now.
It’s usually a bedtime story, bedtime prayers, a kiss and a hug, and into your crib you go.
And honestly, I’m usually so very anxious to set you down, tiptoe out of your room, and not see you until the morning.
But tonight… tonight was different.
Tonight was my last night to hold you as a “baby.”
Tonight was my last chance to soak up your littleness.
Tonight was my last opportunity to say I have an infant.
Because tomorrow, you’ll be one.
Tomorrow, you officially become a toddler.
Tomorrow, our dreams change and our routines change and our milestones change.
Tomorrow, life as we know it will change.
So tonight, I held you.
I held you as your eyes became heavy.
I held you as you snuggled your head into my chest, just like you used to do every single night.
I held you as you sucked your fingers.
I held you as you fell into a deep sleep.
I held you as you began to snore your sweet baby snore that makes my heart melt like nothing else.
I held you as I held your hand, and tears started falling down my face.
I held you as I memorized every little thing about you.
I held you just like I did the first night we brought you home.

I held you for what felt like hours and seconds at the same time.
And then I held you some more.

Tonight I held you, my precious baby girl. And I’m so glad I did.