I thought it would be easier this time around. 

That the wisdom and grit of the past few years would somehow make me immune to the emotion of you turning one. 

Boy oh boy, was I wrong. 

In fact, if it’s possible, this is harder than it was the first time. 

Baby girl, I am a wreck. I can’t believe how fast our time went. How everything has suddenly changed in the blink of an eye. How these emotions are washing over me from out of absolutely nowhere. 

The first 365 days of your life are flashing before my eyes. I keep trying to go back in time and re-live each moment, desperate to soak in your littleness just a little bit more. 

And this past month? Honestly, it’s been cruel. It took so much from us. Sickness upon sickness and grief upon grief. My mama heart is still mourning all the “lasts” that I lost with you. 

But how can I be sad when I think about the amazing little human you’re becoming? 

You, my girl, are the strongest, bravest, toughest little babe I’ve ever known. 

You have a confidence and determination like no other. 

You have a sense of courage I envy. 

You exude such pure joy in all things. 

You have lungs like a freaking lion and I know without a doubt that it’s God-given. 

You are absolutely fearless. And you amaze me in every way. 

So although the sadness in my heart is still very real and I will always wish the last few weeks of your infancy looked so much different than they did, I am also filled with immense gratitude for the perfect little human in front of me. And I can never thank God enough for the gift that you are, sweet pea. 

Love you so much my precious girl – here’s to year number two with you.  

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